Monday, December 3, 2012

Vote now for the 2012 Annual Shiitake Awards!

At long last, voting for the 2012 Shiitake Awards is here!

Click here to vote:

Below is a summary of the nominees of the 2012 Shiitake Awards. This is a banner year for stupidity, so vote now before the Mayan apocalypse begins LOL:

Q1: Who is the worst media mutt of 2012? Which news media representative exemplifies the worst the journalism field has to offer, going beyond mere yellow journalism and into "brown journalism"?

  1. Chelsea Hoffman (Huff Post, Gawker): Blowhard reporter for Gawker and Huff Post with a penchant for stat twisting and stubbornness in the face of facts, in addition to upselling the importance of her works
  2. Chris O'Donnell (Fox 29 Philly): His story helped to get a registrant fired from his job as a Vendor at a Phillies game. This is more foul than the balls hit during the game, and O'Donnell's article strikes out with us.
  3. Ned Hibbert (Fox 26 Houston): His story on parks being "magnets" for registrants living nearby lacked the "attraction" to readers, but not to us.
  4. Phil Elmore (WND): Elmore's inflated statistics is only matched by the size of his mangina, as he reminds us all men are potential predators, including him. Plus his advice was extrapolated from the Cold War era.
  5. Sharon Silver (Proactive Parenting/ Circle of Moms): This Silver's reporting is tarnished when she automatically assumes a man asking questions to a group of boys is grooming them and a predator, makes a big scene, then writes about it.
  6. Chelsea Schilling (WND): Schilling is barely worth two bits, much less a shilling, when she proclaimed children are "raped, sodomized on Facebook" and Facebook was a "predator's playground."
  7. Samantha Manning (KFOX-14): Any reporter who professes a law was intentionally confusing when written by a state legislator but then claims registrants are exploiting loopholes and allowing "sexual predators " to "slip unknowingly into communities" deserves an award. A Shiitake award.
  8. Brian Bishop (WCYB 5 Virginia): Bishop should be flogged for harassing a homeless registrant for parking his RV in a Walmart parking lot, despite later admitting the law stated it was legal
  9. Abbie Alford (Fox 23 Tulsa): Abbie's second appearance in the Shiitakes, this time she heckled a man for FTR in true junior high fashion
  10. Ryan Luby (KETV 7 Omaha): Ran a three-part story on the vigilante troll-site Evil-Unveiled, despite protests from the many victims of the hate group. Watch his future story on the kinder, gentler KKK at 11.
  11. John Turchin (South FL Local 10) Take the T off his last name and you get an accurate depiction of a reporter disguising propaganda' ad for the AWA posing as an actual news story.
  12. Alan English, Sean Moores, & Kyle Martin: The three Augusta Chronicle Stooges are nyuk-nyuking it up after writing a fluff piece failing to differentiate between general and specific recidivism, then attacking and censoring opposing viewpoints.
  13. Anna Canzano (KATU Portland OR): she is sounding the alarm over the fact Oregon only lists so-called "high-risk" offenders, something that isn't news at all, since Oregonians have known for years the registry only lists Tier 3 offenders. D'oh! add that to the news promo practically stolen from the Bill Blathers radio show, you have the makings of a Shiitake winner

Q2: Which is the Dumbest News Outlet of 2012? This category is for media outlets who go above and beyond in exploiting poorly-created sex offender news stories for ratings on a consistent basis.

  1. KATU of Portland, OR: KATU has Anna Canzano in the current awards, but their incessant focus on residency laws and trying to force the closure and transfer of rehabilitation programs for registrants gives KATU a special place at this year's awards show.
  2. New York Post: The infamous news rag known for their outrageous front page graphics should be equally known for their shoddy reporting, as they reported NYC was facing a "perv storm" of homeles registrants, caused primarily of social ostracism and discrimination. Such as being called "pervs" by the media
  3. Dothan Eagle: Should be called the D'oh!than Eagle after allowing hate speech to be placed in their newspapers, especially when the guest writer is quoting Bible scripture to justify suicide and murder.
  4. Q13Fox WA: A catchy headline is all it takes sometimes, like assuming everyone on the list is "the worst of the worst" and they are "closer than you might think."


Q3. Who is the worst politico of 2012? All pols pander but some out-pander the rest.

  1. Sheriff Alan Norman of Cleveland County, NC: wants to make registrants pay $242 per year so he can feed his Krispy Kreme addiction. Oops, I mean harass the registrants in his community. Considering most registrants are unemployed, I doubt they can buy donuts for themselves, much less for Stormin' Norman.
  2. NM Gov. Suzanna Martinez: She's an ex-prosecutor who "specialized" in sex crimes cases and is fluent in myths and lies, and has tried unsuccessfully to bully her state into AWA compliance.
  3. Greg Smith, KS Senator: Up for re-election this year, Smith exploits his personal tragedy, a' la Walsh, into a budding political career. He pushed Kansas into AWA compliance and supporting Caylee's Law
  4. Indiana Federal Judge Judge Tanya Walton Pratt: Upholds a blanket ban against registrants' internet use based on "governmental interest" despite most rulings stating the opposite
  5. Colorado Republican Doug Lamborn: He supports the coal industry; he accuses an opponent of "disseminating CP" when the opponent shows a pic of a child bathing in dirty water, despite the pic not being graphic
  6. Tony Rackauckas, Orange County California D.A.: Trying to use sex offender park bans to further his political career, while deflecting the victims of police brutality under his watch. Look for a big for state AG in the near future.
  7. Debra Young Maggart, TN Rep: Drafted a civil forfeiture law on the basis that "Sex offenders are usually very clever people. They're very manipulative people and so they're always looking for a way for whatever law we put in place"
  8. Paula Stitz, AR registry consultant: Former small town cop fired for ethics violations, then gets promoted to work on Arky's state registry, like a bad fairy tale.
  9. Bobby Jindal, Louisiana Governor: Making yet another appearance in the Shiitake Awards, Jindal is livid over a federal court decision that struck down a pet project of his-- banning former offenders from using social networking sites, vowing to fight all the way to the Supreme Court, as well as a spot on this year's awards show.

Q4. Which quote is the Dumbest Quote of 2012? Some people say the dumbest things, but there is dumb, dumberer and dumberest. Which is the dumberest of all?

  1. "This country is based on vigilantism" -- Patrick Drum, violent vigilante "hero" of Pt Angeles Washington who murdered two registrants
  2. "Too often, sex offenders are portrayed sympathetically while the victims are forgotten. What are we telling the victims that are still out there and alive when we keep giving [sex offenders] second and third chances?" -- Linda Walker, Surviving Parents' Coalition, and Dru Sjodin's mom
  3. "The public has the right to know these people were dangerous, probably still are dangerous, or can be dangerous in the future to young children. Children don't really have a means to protect themselves. By having a means to access information that is out there about crimes these people commit is paramount to keep their children safe." -- Richard Ferrucci, "Senior Investigator" at the Oneida Co NY District Attorney's Office
  4. “When these people are out of compliance they are hunting your kids and your grandkids to sexually assault them,” -- Shelby Co. OH Sheriff John Lenhart
  5. “They do not want us to find them and that is part of the problem why they move around so much,” -- Det. Cori Steiner of the Shelby County OH Sheriff’s Office
  6. “They play huge games with the system. They know how many days to live in a certain spot before they have to tell Ohio that they’ve moved.” -- Bill Taylor, senior inspector for the U.S. Marshals Service.
  7. "when sex offenders feel they have escaped the eye of local law enforcement, they begin searching for victims. They could spend as much as three to five years gaining the trust of a neighboring family." -- Tiffany Kemp, program director for Shelby County OH Victim Services

Q5. Who is the "Everyday Zeroes Award" winner for 2012? This category is for everyday citizens who exploit registrants for fifteen minutes of fame.

  1. Emily Miner of Oswego, NY: She is circulating a petition to have a 9-year-old-kid kicked out of school, proclaiming him a sexual predator. Maybe we can petition to get her a Shiitake?
  2. Savannah Deitrich, KY: A teen who drank at a party and had sex, claimed rape, and created a blog to shame her attackers, all in direct violation of a court order. Well, the Shiitakes also runs a blog exposing people, what a coincidence!
  3. Brandon Benhamin Mau, Ft. Collins, CO: This man is a career criminal arrested for kidnapping and attacking a man with a knife, mistaking him for a sex offender. Ever notice how many here physically attacking registrants are people with lengthy records?
  4. Brian Oei, Trumbull, CT: Puts the bull in Trumbull, as he was caught harassing a registrant via Twitter and posting personal info about his victim online, then ran as he was exposed
  5. Laurie Ann Martinez of Folsom, CA: Went all out to falsely accuse a man of rape including getting a friend to punch her in the face. She could use a Shiitake Award for that, it is made of iron.

Q6. Which Politico/ Celebrity advocate made the Hardest Fall of 2012? This category is for the biggest scandals of the year

  1. James Thomas, AL rep: The 69-year-old Thomas was charged with having sexual contact with a 17-year-old honor student in his office at Wilcox-Central High School in Camden in November 2010.
  2. The victim, now a 19-year-old college student, testified that Thomas kissed her and forced her to touch his "private parts."
  3. Carlos Bustamante, Orange Co., CA: Specifically, prosecutors have charged Bustamante, who was arrested at 4:30 p.m. Monday by D.A. investigators, with 12 felonies and four misdemeanors, including: Six felony counts of false imprisonment, three of assault with the intent to commit a sexual offense, and one count each of stalking, attempted sexual battery by restraint, and grand theft by false pretense, and one misdemeanor count each of battery, assault, sexual battery, and attempted sexual battery with a sentencing enhancement allegation for committing the offenses as a result of sexual compulsion and for the purpose of sexual gratification, according to a District Attorney's Office news release. He voted to the Santa Ana Park Ban prior to his arrest.
  4. Secret Service Colombian Prostitute Scandal: Considering the current stance on so-called sex trafficking, I would have thought this would have been a bigger story. But there's nothing to see here. Move along.
  5. Jose Manuel Santiago, Pennsylvania police officer: Crooked cop claimed an evil spirit caused him to sleep with a 14-yr-old girl

Q7. Holy Shiitakes! What is the craziest sex-related story of 2012?

1. Parents claim V-Tech's "Catch-Me-Kitty Toy" is saying, "catch me, rape me". Methinks the parents need a Miracle Ear than can differentiate between race and rape.

2. Kit-Kat pulls Aussie ad over Pedobear costume scare. Gimme a break!

3. Fiction writer Jennifer Chase censors one side of debate after asking if double-murderer Patrick Drum is a "hero" for murdering two registrants. If you don't like the answers, don't ask.

4. Lance Armstrong blames his doping scandal on a sex offender: I've heard excuses for sex crimes, but I've never heard a person use a registrant as an excuse to take steroids. The man's crime? Indecent exposure. That means he was the right man to expose the truth.

5. Church Mutual Insurance forces churches to weed out registrants for 'liability' reasons: Big Insurance companies tried forcing small churches to target registrants and limit or ban them or they will drop the coverage.

6. Girl lies about rape, RSO still held on $150,000 bond: So this girl lies, claiming this homeless registrant raped her. Then she took it back and now says he only told her he wanted to fuck her. So he's being held on a $150,000 bond on the basis of a statement from someone who admitted to lying.

7. The Michael Arena Retrial: This man has been in 13 years on the basis of a girl's rape accusation she later recanted, and the misrepresentation of the accuracy of the Abel Screening Test. A false accusation plus a false test plus 13 years equals a Shiitake nod. Free the guy already!

8. Alex Anzalone, Ohio State Buckeyes linebacker prospect finds dumbest excuse EVER to decommit: by freaking out over getting a picture taken with a registrant, unknowingly of course, who attended a free Buckeyes football event. Anzalone should be flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct.

9. West Virginia forces man convicted in 1976 of ADULTERY to register: At least the man is suing the state. The law was abolished in the 1980s, yet this man was forced to register for cheating on his wife. Take me home, to the place, I belong West Virginia, take me home (then register)

10. Madison County (AL) Operation Spring Cleaning: "One by one, the cars stopped in front of a house, the deputies spilling out of their cars and taking their positions - two on the left side of the house, four on the right, another in a black SUV that held K-9 Rambo and two others who approached the front door.Some were in the foliage green, Army-like uniforms of the sheriff's SWAT team, others in the gray uniforms of the sheriff's reserve volunteers and one, Deputy Johnny Daversa, in the all black K-9 uniform." My mind envisions the Keystone cops or the jokes about how many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb

11. White van canvasses the neighborhood, searching for lost puppy. Sound the alarm in 3..2..1..": So some guy in Boston who owns a white van was looking for a puppy. So what was the guy REALLY doing? He was... LOOKING FOR HIS LOST DOG! Moral of the story, if you are a man who loses a dog, let the mutt stay lost. But it was enough of a scare to hit the news media.

12. WA Man freed after 9 years after daughter admits she lied about abuse: Only she was not charged, of course. The girl got her idea from a friend who got her stepdad sent to prison.

13. Stray bullet wounds Minneapolis police officer during hunt for sex offender: Deputies harass registrant, go to house, get scared by dogs and start shooting, one officer hit by friendly fire, officer gets Shiitake Award.

14. Neighbors think suspicious van’s driver is on sex offender registry in Chesterfield, VA: Its a story about a "suspicious white van" in a place called CHESTERfield. Oh, geez. The van looks lost, doesn't approach anyone but sets off the panic button.

15. The Great Wall of Des Moines: Des Moines spend a million bucks to build a fence so zoo-goers cannot see a halfway house where a couple of registrants are staying with other low-risk registrants. Does NBC still do those Fleecing of America segments?

16. Grove mother may go to prison for marrying sex offender, prosecutor said: A Grove woman on probation for having her children with her when she was arrested for public intoxication could be sent to prison after marrying a convicted sex offender — a likely probation violation, a prosecutor said. So you can't even marry a registrant in Jokelahoma.

17. Miami Commission Sues State Over Sex Offenders in Bookville II: Like a bad sequel, this scenario stars Ron Book and homeless Miami Sex Offenders. Longtime Shiitakes voters knew the first show was bad and this was the most unanticipated sequel of the decade, as the city sues the state to keep registrants out of housing in Miami.

18. Man can't see his daughter for reporting CP on the internet (England): A man who informed police when he found child abuse images on his computer has not been allowed to be alone with his daughter for four months. Cheerio and all that rot! The bloody wankers in Jolly ol' England are a bit tipsy with their sex register as well!
Q8. Which is the dumbest law of 2012? It need not pass to be nominated

1. California's Prop 35: will turn consenting adults (like prostitutes and Johns) into sex offenders, then force them to register internet passwords

2. Oswego, NY city council bans registrants from driving taxis: Obviously influenced by Robert Deniro's Taxi Driver movie. From the 1970s. But didn't the cabbie save the teen hooker in that film?

3. PA law to take earned pensions from registrants: Last year was the Caylee Anthony Law" this year it is the "Jerry Sandusky" law

4. Senate Bill 3258 IL, Bike trail bans: Bike trails in Harrisburg and Eldorado are now designated as off-limits to persons on the Illinois Sex Offender Registry thanks to a new law, Senate Bill 3258, passed this spring and signed by the governor June 22.

5. LA Facebook status disclosure law: Jindal's backdoor law to get registrants off Facebook is rather clever, get facebook to do your dirty work for you

6. NJ attempts re-issuing residency restrictions: Defeated by the NJ Supreme Court, the legislators, like Jindals, are try-trying again

7. LA Library Ban. Gov. Jindal strikes again

8. CT to make masturbating in prison a sex offense: Anything to make more registrants huh?

9. Illinois SB3579 makes participation in any activities involving children a sex crime

10. Louisiana HB 839: Banning registrants from driving tow trucks, lest they molest cars too

11. Virtual Predator Panic: NY Atty Gen wants to ban RSOs from Online Games

12. Illinois HB 4670: Allows registrants to repay the annoual $100 registry fee at the rate of one dollar per hour, far less than minimum wage

13: Missouri HR 83: Removes sex offenders as a class from Constitutional protections against Ex Post Facto laws

14. Tennessee HB 3398: Civil forfeiture law turns registrants into $$$

15: Nebraska LB 797: The Kissing Crime -- Kissing considered a sex crime

16. Kansas SB 39: Residency Restrictions -- Here especially because Kansas once passed a moratorium against residency restrictions
Q9. Which is the worst state of 2012? (The "ICBS National CHUMPionship")

1. California: Prop 35, Carlos Bustamante scandal, OC Park Bans

2. Washington: The vigilante capital of the US, where a string of vigilantes targeting registrants has run rampant

3. Louisiana: Bobby Jindal, library and internet bans defying court orders

4. Kansas: AWA compliance, trying to pass residency laws after moratorium was passed

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